interview with a ghoul
by AGENT Kuma-chan
Summary: These ghouls are like ghosts from the past. -Haise, Kaneki, Tsukiyama, Touka, Hinami, and a series of interviews.
1. question 1: touka

**Title:** Question 1: Touka

 **Prompt:** "but I like it because it is bitter and because it is my heart"

 **A/N:** So, this is will be a series of interviews between Haise and the other ghouls. A little bit of creativity will be taken with canon.

 **Summary:** _Just like their meeting, the coffee tasted slightly bitter._

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"Here, the usual." Touka gracefully placed the steaming cup before him. "Is that all?"

"Er, yes," Haise replied awkwardly, realizing just how often he came here. He even knew her name. "Thanks."

She smiled, turning to leave. "Call me if you need anything else."

"Actually," Haise blurted quickly. "Could you stay?"

She looked at him with surprise as he resisted the urge to cover his mouth. What was he saying? He had wanted to ask, for weeks now, if they knew each other. If he wasn't just crying because this coffee tasted like home but was home. Something in him ached from it all, from this remembrance he couldn't quite place.

But that was all he had. A feeling. A single thought that he might have known a girl like her once.

Before Haise could let her go, Touka nodded. "Sure."

"Huh?" Haise stared at her, shocked.

She gestured at the near-empty cafe and shrugged. "I have time."

Pulling out a chair, Touka sat down across from him and stared at him expectantly. She was tense, almost nervous.

She had been anticipating this, he realized. Anticipating him.

"I…Do we..."

The words were there, right there. On the tip of his tongue. In the corner of his mind, a voice urged him on, and he repressed a shiver.

It might be _that_ voice.

He didn't want to know. He wanted to know. At a loss for words, he swallowed hard.

"Your...your coffee is always good," he finally said, and winced at how awkward that sounded.

This was clearly not the question she had been waiting for. Touka looked confused and stiffly replied. "Thank you. An old friend taught me."

He couldn't have asked for a better opening. Steeling his courage, Haise asked,"Me?"

Touka snorted, so inelegant and unlike what he expected. An amused grin covered her face as she relaxed and shook her head. "No, definitely not."

"I'm not that bad at cooking," he weakly protested, mildly insulted.

"I didn't say you were," Touka softly rebutted.

Haise frowned, not quite satisfied. Somehow, it was too easy to talk to her. "We were friends," he stated. That had to be a fact.

Touka looked thoughtful as she examined him. "...no, _we_ were not friends."

"But you knew me." Haise persisted. He couldn't be wrong about this.

"No, I don't know _you_." This time he caught the word she stressed, the tone of it.

"So…" Haise could still hear the voice in the back of his ear, see the shadowy figure waiting to be free. "You knew _him_."

"Once, I thought I did." Touka wasn't really looking at him anymore.

Haise looked away, not sure of what to say. Those words, they weren't for him. "Do you miss him?"

Touka rested her cheek on her right hand. "Sometimes."

Her words were short but her voice was soft. Haise almost reached out to touch her, she looked so brittle.

"I'm sorry." He couldn't face her properly, directing the words at the table instead.

"For what?" Touka shrugged. "You did nothing."

"I know...but still…" Haise muttered, guiltily. "I'm sorry."

She tapped her fingers on her cheek, aggravated. "Are you happy?"

"Huh?" He snapped his head up to look at her.

"Are you happy?" she repeated, her fingers tapping her cheeks in an ever-quickening pace.

"I…" Haise swallowed, thrown by the question. By the brutal honesty her expression demanded. "I...It might be temporary but I like where I am."

"Then that's all I need to know." Touka straightened up, clasping her hands in front of her.

Haise gaped at her. That couldn't be all. "Don't you want him back?"

"It would be nice."

"Then why aren't you doing something?" He was almost afraid to hear the answer. If she tried, he didn't think he could fight it.

Touka twirled her hair around a finger. "My friend is no longer here." He could hear the longing in her voice, for times long gone. "You are not him. There's nothing else to it."

"He…" Haise hesitated, not sure if she should hear this. If she could hear this. "He sometimes—"

"But he's making the choice to not come back." Touka looked him in the eyes now, leaning forward. "And I have made the choice to keep moving forward." Her hands covered his, squeezing it tight. "And you are happy where you are, so there is nothing I have to do."

This was the answer he wanted and yet he was not happy at all. Her hands slipped off his and he couldn't move.

She was letting go of him. They've been in that position before, he was sure of it. They've been here before and this line, this situation, it was all scripted. All in reverse.

Even this touch, familiar as it was, was not so much comforting as it was a farewell.

She was becoming a stranger again. Stepping out from his life and back into his other's.

For the first time, he wondered what it was like. The person he used to be. The life he used to have. If she had been in it, it couldn't have been so bad.

"Can I meet you again?" His thoughts slipped out before could stop them.

Touka blinked and gave him a smile. Unlike before, it was polite and distant.

"Of course." She got up, her break over. "You are a customer."

She was drawing a line between them.

"I need to get back," she added before returning to the cashier.

He couldn't go any further than this.

"I understand. Thank you for your time."

And if she was familiar, he couldn't imagine what he was to her.

Haise took another sip of his coffee. Just like their meeting, it tasted slightly bitter.


	2. question 2: tsukiyama

**Title:** question 2: tsukiyama

 **Prompt:** if you ever need anything from me, I would like you to ask.

 **A/N:** Ugh, I don't like this one as much as the ones coming after this.

 **Summary:** "Sasaki Haise!" Tsukiyama seemed to taste the word, a predatory look in his eyes.

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"Oh, hello again!" A man gasped in surprise as he stopped suddenly in front of Haise. "I didn't think we would meet like this."

"Yes…" Haise tried to remember his name, but it escaped him. He almost didn't recognize the man in front of him—last time he saw him he had been skin and bones. "It's...unexpected that we bumped into each other."

He tried to feign surprise, but it was hard to when he was pretty sure this stranger was anything but.

This felt more like an ambush than an accidental meeting. Perfectly engineered and Haise was waiting for the other shoe to drop.

"I had hoped to see you again after that...unfortunate meeting we had last time." The man gestured at his body proudly. "As you can see, I have quite recovered since then."

"Yeah, you look a lot better now..." It was no good, Haise just couldn't recall his name.

"Tsukiyama Shuu," the other man added with an understanding smile. He held his hand out. "You are?"

"Sasaki Haise," he replied, automatically shaking his hand.

"Sasaki Haise!" Tsukiyama seemed to taste the word, a satisfied expression on his face. "That _is_ a good name. What brings you out here today?"

"I'm just buying some books."

Tsukiyama's face lit up as though this was the opening he was waiting for. Haise repressed a shiver. It was hard not to feel like prey when he smiled like that.

"What a coincidence, I was about to go to a cafe nearby. It is quaint but its book collection, _c'est magnifique_."

"That's nice but I—" A woman bumped into Haise as she hurried past and he caught himself before he fell. "I'm good."

Tsukiyama continued as though he hadn't heard Haise. "Please, join me. I would like to make up for last time."

"You don't have to." The crowd pushed around them. They really shouldn't have stopped in such a busy area. Haise was jostled once more, almost falling over.

"It is a far better place to discuss matters than here." Tsukiyama grabbed Haise's arm and helped him regain his balance. "Trust me, you will like it."

His words were too confident, his tone bordering arrogance. It burst from him and in the back of Haise's mind, alarm bells rang.

This stranger was a past acquaintance, he was certain. A ghoul, most likely. Someone he should capture or report at the very least. There was something almost predatory about this man, about the way he moved.

Tsukiyama was trouble waiting to happen.

Despite that, Haise hesitated. This was a chance. Possibly his only chance to find out about the person he used to be. Arima and Akira refused to talk about it and Touka gently rebuked him.

He might never get an opportunity like this again.

And if Tsukiyama were truly dangerous, he was sure his past self would have said something by now.

"Sure." Haise nodded in agreement. "We haven't really had a good time to talk before."

"Great!" Tsukiyama started to lead the way. True to his word, the cafe was only ten minutes away, barely a walk at all.

Sitting down across from Tsukiyama , Haise froze. A sudden burst of deja vu rolled over him—he had been here before. He had sat at this chair, asked for a coffee, looked across to this man in this exact way.

Even before his order arrived, Haise knew what it tasted like.

"Have I…" Haise's voice faltered, not sure how to continue the question. _Have I been here? Have I talked to you like this before?_

The answers to both questions were yes, 100% certainty.

"Isn't it marvelous?" Tsukiyama asked, a knowing smirk on his face.

Haise could only nod. Was this a trap? Tsukiyama was looking at him expectantly, waiting for a response.

Waiting for a sign.

The feeling of deja vu washed over him once more but he didn't know why.

"It's nice," he finally replied.

"I see…" He could hear the disappointment in Tsukiyama's voice. They sat there stiffly before Tsukiyama lit up once more.

"Before I forget, here's a book I _know_ you will like." He got up and went to the small shelf of books in the cafe before quickly returning with a small black book. On the cover was a single white egg.

Haise's heart almost stopped at the sight.

Tsukiyama pushed it to the middle of the table. " _The Goat's Egg_."

" _The...The Goat's Egg_?" And these words, these words were almost intimate; they rolled off his tongue so well. His fingers trembled as he pulled the book closer.

This book was his, he was sure. Maybe not this exact copy, but the story, the story was almost written in his DNA.

"Thank you." Haise swallowed, resisting the urge to flip through the book right now.

"Read it when you have time," Tsukiyama said, clearly delighted. This was the reaction he had been waiting for.

This had to have been it. Haise's fingers curled over the book.

 _Did you know me?_ The question was on the tip of his tongue, almost out his mouth, when his phone buzzed.

Another mission, urgent, and he had not time to waste.

"I'm sorry, I have to go," Haise apologized, getting up. As he took money out of his wallet, a hand stopped him firmly.

"Don't worry about this trivial amount. It's my treat." Tsukiyama smiled.

"But—"

"Next time, you can return the favour."

This time, the opening was for him. It was fine, his question could wait.

"Ok, I'll do that then."

Next time, he could get his answer.


	3. question 3: kaneki

**Title:** Question 3-Kaneki

 **Prompt:** "don't make me talk about it. i wouldn't know the words."

 **Character/Pairing:** Kaneki, Haise

 **A/N:** Ahaha, took me forever to post the rest of the series. Anyways, this might be out of date because I haven't been keeping up with the manga so I'm a bit behind. Particularly the ending will probably be no longer canon since I'm sure by now that mystery is solved.

 **Summary:** _Just who was Kaneki? No matter where he went, Haise couldn't get a straight answer._

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It was dark when Haise opened his eyes. Grey-dark, the colour of a starless sky. Without a moon, he could see the bare outlines of shapes—a chair, a person, a solitary table. There were no rooms, no buildings here; just a horizon as far as the eye could see. In the vast space, he felt small, insignificant.

Shivering slightly, Haise rubbed his arms. It's funny how a place with no wind, no environment could feel so cold. This place was an empty, alien world.

"Where—oh," he breathed as he recognized his surroundings. It had been a while since he'd last visited. No, not visited, that made it sound like he could control when he came here. It had been a while since he was last _summoned_ here.

And the one who summoned him was still sitting on the chair, not even giving the slightest indication he was aware that Haise was here. The man—no, boy, and that was strange, that the one who really owned this body was a child. That the one who called the shots was younger than him.

"Why am I here?" he asked, his voice muffled by the heavy darkness. It almost seemed to swallow him, each footstep he took was on mute, each action in slow motion.

Kaneki kept quiet, his white hair glowing in the dim light. It stood out too much, blinding Haise as he tried to make out the boy's face.

With a frown, he tried again. "What are you thinking about?"

Kaneki didn't move from his chair, a statue gazing off into the distance. Time held no meaning here and Haise couldn't say if he waited a minute or an eon for a response. It felt hard to breathe here, something heavy weighing on his chest as he tried to breathe in.

"What are you looking at?"

Haise bit his lip, frustrated.

It was the same no matter where he went. Outside, no one would speak of Kaneki. Neither Arima or the café manager, his boss or a random book-giving stranger. There were rumours, a cold look, a sharp warning. A single file in a library mentioning deaths and a memory he shouldn't press into.

In here, it wasn't any better. Kaneki left scattered hints, the barest of memories to work with. A peek at a past, a feeling, a thought, a taste. Enough to remind Haise he was a tenant of this body, not the landlord. Enough to inform him there was a history to Kaneki, a history to this body that Haise couldn't easily replace.

But nothing more, nothing meaningful. Just thoughts and words and feelings. It was almost like Kaneki wanted to disappear, despite his actions to the contrary.

Despite his _words_ to the contrary. Haise could still remember his plea, his desire to live. His wish to save Hina.

That desperation was all but gone now.

Haise closed his eyes, trying to will his way back to waking. There was no point in being here if Kaneki wasn't going to speak. A moment passed, another, and when he opened his eyes he was still there.

Still stuck in this barren world, a land without time and distance and meaning.

He clenched his fists, irritated. Haise couldn't come here when he wanted to and now he couldn't leave either.

"What is it?" Haise snapped. It might not be his body, but he didn't have to be treated like this. "What do you want?"

Still nothing. Kaneki might as well be a corpse; it was like talking to air.

"Why—" Haise stopped, remembering just what he had read before he fell asleep last night. "Is it because she's going to be executed soon?"

There was an imperceptible intake of air, an almost soundless gasp. Kaneki turned toward him. Haise took a step back-that desperation was back, a bright spark in his eyes.

"How long does Hina have?" the boy weakly asked. His fingers clutched his chair tightly, his knuckles white from the pressure. Colour started to filter back into this world, all of it dreary, all of it dull.

Haise stared in surprise. He didn't think Kaneki would react at all, let alone say something. "I...She's on the execution block, so a few weeks."

"Could it be extended?" Kaneki questioned urgently, his voice breaking. Haise could almost see the reds of his words, the mixture of anger and helplessness.

"...to a few months, maybe, if she can help in some way…" Haise hesitated, before adding, "but she's been moved there because they don't think she can."

"Oh." Haise could almost see Kaneki's hope shatter, could feel the breath knocked out of his lungs. Everything turned blue with resignation. "Ok then."

Kenaki was shutting down again. Already, he was returning to his chair and staring at the spot in the distance. Desperate to keep the conversation going, Haise quickly said, "She's been wanting to meet you."

It didn't stop him and Kaneki sat back in his original position. "I see."

"I don't." Haise spat out, tired of this game.

Tired of trying to guess just what Kaneki wanted, just what answer he was looking for. Haise had tried, had spent hours just staring out into the abyss, but no responses came back from the shadows.

"She's important to you, right?" Haise asked, getting up now and moving to sitting boy. "Why don't you just take over and save her already?"

"I…" Kaneki stumbled over his words, over his excuses. "It's...not...It's your body now."

"You've taken over it before, it's…" Haise swallowed, the next words hard to say despite his resolve. "It's fine. I don't mind."

He was going to disappear one day anyways.

"No, I can't. If I...If I go…"

"You'll save her."

"No…" Kaneki looked up at Haise now, his eyes wide and desperate. "I can't. I'm afraid."

He resisted the urge to take a step back. His voice came out in a whisper, as though anything louder would shatter the fragile child in front of him. "Why?"

"If I come back, I'll remember. If I come back, I'll know." Kenaki gripped Haise's arm tightly. "He...what I did...I'll remember."

A word came unbidden to Haise's mind, a name he didn't know. Shouldn't know. "Hideyoshi?"

Kaneki stilled, the memory more than he could bear.

"Who is he?"

"Don't ask. Please. Just...don't." Kaneki released Haise, sinking into his chair. "I'd rather stay here in the dark than remember."

"And let her die?" Haise shouted, incredulously. "She calls you her brother!"

Kaneki trembled and shook his head. "I can't. I just can't."


	4. question 4: Hinami

**Title:** Question 4

 **Prompt:** you're in the right place at the right time, and you care enough to do what needs to be done. sometimes that's enough.

 **Character/Pairing:** Haise, Hina, Kaneki

 **A/N:** I haven't really caught up with the manga after it started the 'save Hina' arc. So pardon any canon divergences.

 **Summary:** She gave a smile, and he knew it would be heartbreak when she died.

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"How are you?" Haise asked through the glass. It was a strange sight, a strange fact to know that they needed this barrier.

The girl in front of him looked like she should be in school right now, not sitting on death row.

"I'm fine," Hina replied, smiling. She patted the books stacked beside her. "Thank you for the books."

"It's...it's nothing," Haise stumbled over his words, still not sure how to talk to her.

Not sure why he was doing this. Only, the boy inside him, he would never have recovered if she'd died that time.

Even now, he could only catch glimpses from Kaneki. Nothing more, just fragments of feelings.

It wasn't enough to explain why he was still sitting here once a month. She belonged to a past that was never his.

And soon, her future would no longer exist either.

"Did you bring more?" she asked, curiously, breaking his thoughts.

He cracked a smile. She asked the same question every time. "The guards will swap the books later, just return whatever you're done with. You're a quick reader."

"They're good books," she replied, eagerly. "They're so interesting—I really liked the mystery ones with the cat detective."

"That's good." He couldn't really claim credit for them, most books he had were from Arima or Akira. "I liked the _Goat Egg_ more myself."

"That one…" Hina frowned. "It was a little….dark...I didn't like it that much."

"It is a little," Haise admitted, scratching his cheek. "But it really made me think."

Hina frowned, doubtfully. "Really? I guess I'll try to finish it then…"

Haise chuckled, shaking his head. "You don't have to read it if you don't like it."

"But you liked it...so I have to try…"

"Is it hard to read?" He wasn't sure what education she had, if any. Did ghouls go to school? Did they stay home? He never really thought of it before. "Some of the kanji characters are difficult to understand. I can teach you, if you need help."

"It's fine! My brother taught me." She smiled fondly at him and his smile dropped. She wasn't really seeing him now, but Kaneki instead. A ghost in a ghost. "I can do it now."

Even that smile, that reassurance, none of it was for him. He felt paper thin, stretched out.

"I'm…" Haise looked away, disquieted. "I'm not your brother."

"...I know." Her words were quiet, almost too low to hear. "I just...forget sometimes."

"And…" This part was harder. He couldn't look at her while he spoke, keeping his gaze fixed on the wall beside him. "He won't come to see you."

"Oh." Hina looked at him now, the smile slipping from her face. "He...he won't?"

"He…" Haise swallowed, watching her from the corner of his eyes. "He can't."

"...Oh, ok." She almost seemed to collapse on herself, for a moment. "That's...that's…"

"I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault." She shook her head, wiping the tears from her eyes.

"Still, I'm sorry."

She smiled now, a watery mess. "You're very much like my brother. Just as kind as he was. Thank you for telling me."

Haise couldn't reply. It would be heartbreak, he knew, when she died.

And not just for Kaneki this time.


End file.
